I'm Matt Mayer, and here's my Thursday

5pm - wake up to a phone call (yeah, I said 5pm, because I took a 3 hour power nap on a couch in a strange apartment until 8am, which is when I began walking back to my place, all the while trying to uncrick my neck without snapping it, so by the time the pain subsided and I fell asleep for real I had already missed brunch.)

Let me start over without the interruption.

5pm - wake up to a phone call offering me a free Coldplay ticket WHAT.
5pm and 3 seconds - accept free Coldplay ticket
7pm - leave for DC to do standup at Topaz with Andy
8pm - do some new jokes and some old jokes in a new way to mixed responses
830pm - peace out to see coldplay at the MCI center
9pm - arrive at the administrative entrance, question my friend as to why we're not going in the main entrance
901pm - my friend flashes the tickets at me. I see the words "executive suite" on them. WHAT?

you get the picture.

So Coldplay was pretty great. They put on an awesome show, sweet effects, big screen, great music. I don't usually go to the big venues for concerts. I usually check out the underground stuff that hold like 2000 people at MOST in a venue, with no seats, that sort of thing. I only saw one other arena/stadium venue concert, and let me tell you, NSYNC was incredible. I'll tell you why I went. My aunt bought me a ticket, and I went with my sisters. Oh, and because I asked my aunt if should could get me tickets, and my sisters said "Hey, I kinda would like to go ... not quite as much as you, Matt, but I wouldn't mind seeing them ... Matt, the concert's not for 3 weeks, you can take off your 'I HEART JC' shirt."

I come home, hang with Andy for a few and get a call from a freshman friend of mine, somebody who I met through my younger sister. She asks me to come out to the bar, so I do (of course). I get there and can't find her, but I find her friends, also freshmen. so we hang out for a bit, dance, then I notice an individual named Chris is hanging with them as well, and suddenly I'm in a quarter-life crisis. I will tell you why.

Chris is at least a year older than me (6th or 7th year at Maryland) and is notorious for being a sketchy (but sexy) goon who hangs out on the freshman side of campus and in the dining halls to pick up freshman girls despite the 5 or 6 year age difference. By all accounts and by my personal opinion, he is scum. And yet there I am hanging out with the same freshman girls as he is. I started to question myself, started to go through existential trauma. I was forced to ask myself questions I never thought I'd have to ask. I was no faced with the question "am I a scum-sucking, freshman-loving, 5th year sleazebag?"

I thought about this for a while, thought of lots of arguments for either direction; complicated, detailed explanations for either side of the coin. But I'm not telling you any of them. I will tell you that I've decided I'm not a scumbag.

So I take the drunk freshmen home, and one of them pukes in my car, in the trunk of which is my "I HEART JC" shirt. Full circle. Sweet. End of story, goodnight.